Two Important Social And Emotional Skills for Academic Success
By Andrew McPeak Growing up, David Aguilar was obsessed with LEGOs. Like many kids he would build creations utilizing his imagination, but unlike many kids David was building to solve a specific problem: he had been born with only one hand. David was born with a specific genetic condition called Poland Syndrome, which caused his right arm below the elbow to not
What Can Betty Robinson Teach Students about Grit?
By Tim Elmore You may have never heard the Betty Robinson story, but it’s worth knowing. It informs our work with students today. Betty was a kid who grew up a hundred years ago in Riverdale, Illinois. In high school, she had to catch a train to her campus, quite literally. One day, she found herself running on the platform as
Four Ideas to Help Today’s Kids Delay Gratification
By Tim Elmore One of the best decisions my parents made was during the summer of my eleventh year. I begged them to let me go to Bobby Leonard’s Sports Camp, one state over, and three hours away. I pestered them long enough to convince them it was a good idea. My parents dropped me off on Sunday and were expected to
How to Help Students Stop Making Excuses and Start to Grow
By Tim Elmore I was in a coaching session with a college freshman, who explained to me how she just wasn’t “a math person.” This launched a conversation about how Abby couldn’t do this or that, and that her career was likely very limited. Along with her math challenges, Abby said things like: “I don’t have a creative bone in
The Seven Best Books I Read Last Year
By Tim Elmore The Seven Best Books I Read Last Year Each year, I enjoy posting a list of my favorite books I read in the last twelve months. Admittedly, sometimes the books strike me simply because of the life station I am in. Books can stand out not so much because they are brilliant for everyone, but because they come
How to Have a Self-Aware Holiday
By Tim Elmore When I reflect on past holiday seasons in my life, I see that I suffered from acute low self-awareness. It wasn’t so much that I ruined Christmas or Thanksgiving for anyone; I just hampered things for me. In retrospect, I see a pattern that offers a cautionary tale for all of us. As a young man, I entered the
Would Banning Smartphones on Campus Be Helpful or Harmful?
By Time Elmore My friend, Steve Goble, has enjoyed a successful career as a business owner and civil servant. Over the last few years, he chose to be a substitute teacher in his local public high schools. He wanted to spend time investing in today’s young generations. You might not be surprised to hear the experience has been eye-opening for
Three Essentials to Leading Someone from a Different Generation
By Tim Elmore Three Essentials to Leading Someone from a Different Generation I continue to hear stories of Boomer or Gen X managers who become frustrated at the audacity of Generation Z or Millennial team members. One manager said a young job candidate told him in her interview: “I’m going to have your job in eighteen months.” Similarly, young professionals tell me
Seven Strategies to Influence a Student’s Choices
By Tim Elmore A college dean recently acknowledged to me an obvious truth. He said, “The older I get, the more different students become.” He said this, tongue firmly planted in cheek, but I knew exactly what he meant. The generation gap, a term first coined by magazine editor John Poppy back in the 1960s, is more real today than ever. This
Don’t Allow Your Young People to Settle for Happiness
By Tim Elmore I know a young couple who recently got married, but shortly thereafter, one of the partners decided she didn’t want to stay married. Her reasoning? She wasn’t happy. She claimed he never made her happy and she should not have married him. While that may all be true, it grieves me that millions of folks presume other people
The Difference Between Rookies and Veterans at Work
By Tim Elmore Do you see stereotypes at work today? You know what I mean, don’t you? On the one hand, Millennials and Gen Zers assume that Baby Boomers are just “out of touch with reality.” On the other, we hear Gen Xers and Boomers assuming all young people are entitled and narcissistic. = Stereotypes exist for a reason, but far too
A Dozen More Gen Z Terms You Should Know
By Tim Elmore Something’s happened since the spring of 2020 that needs to be addressed. Many of us, especially those under 21, lost some of our communication skills. The lockdown, the anxiety levels, and the diminished interaction between a variety of people changed the way we socialize. And the generation gap widened. Good communication between adults and teens (or young people
Ditch the Niche: An Exercise to Mix with Multiple Generations
By Tim Elmore The ebb and flow of our economy has been bad news for millions of families. The recession and the inflation that followed has created uncertainty. During the pandemic, I watched several extended families locally choose to consolidate their monthly rent or a mortgage payment by living with aunts and uncles, parents or grandparents, and even great-grandparents. Emily, a neighbor,
Is It Possible to Assess Our Ability to Connect with Other Generations?
By Tim Elmore Janet experienced trouble at work just two weeks after she hired Rory. In their weekly meetings, Rory began expressing his distaste for the department’s current strategies. He described their team as a big “L” (meaning “loser”) and said he didn’t know why they weren’t implementing better ideas. Everyone glanced over at Janet, wondering how she’d respond to his audacity.
What It Means for Teens Who Are Going to Work for the First Time
By Tim Elmore What It Means for Teens Who Are Going to Work for the First Time I spoke to a Chick-fil-A owner/operator recently who told me a story I almost couldn’t believe. He said he interviewed a sixteen-year-old high school student who was so sharp, he hired her on the spot. Upon getting her uniform from this notable restaurant brand, she
Who’s Smarter These Days: The Young or the Old?
By Tim Elmore Last month, Janet called Rory into her office. She’s the department manager and Rory, a young professional, serves on her team. She did not appreciate his disrespect toward her when he questioned her authority and her decision in Monday’s meeting. Things came to a head when he walked out of her office before the issue was resolved. She
Ten Ideas to Keep Your Best Generation Z Talent
By: Tim Elmore Ten Ideas to Keep Your Best Generation Z Talent Tim Elmore / GrowingLeaders.com / TimElmore.com “Eighteen months,” declared my friend over lunch last week. “That’s about how long my young team members stay on the job. Some only last 90 days. I don’t know how to keep them.” Indeed, my friend’s experience is not isolated. Gallup released a report in 2016
How to Capitalize on the Younger Generations on Your Team
By: Tim Emlore How to Capitalize on the Younger Generations on Your Team Everyone has witnessed the culture wars. People in our society seem polarized over values and social issues. While I believe those battles are real, there’s a deeper issue at play that we have ignored. You might call it, “generational wars.” It’s happening every day in our workplaces. For years, our
How One Mom Kept Her Teen Off Social Media For Six Years
By: Tim Elmore How One Mom Kept Her Teen Off Social Media for Six Years If you watched The Social Dilemma on Netflix, you know firsthand the challenges of social media platforms today. The documentary allows viewers to hear tech experts sound the alarm on the dangerous impact of social networking which Silicon Valley tech companies manipulate and influence. The film explains
Skills Today’s Graduates Need to Succeed
By: Tim Elmore I graduated from college with good grades, but not straight As. Part of the reason was, I worked two or three jobs every year of my college life. I worked as a cook in a country club, I worked part-time in the library, I worked as a part-time youth director, and I worked at a fast-food restaurant. While
Three Ingredients to Help Students Recover Following a Pandemic
By: Tim Elmore Today’s kids were already facing mental health problems. Now they feel delayed by COVID-19, and it’s added to their anxiety levels. According to Barna’s research, 82 percent of Generation Z members believe they’ve been traumatized. While it sounds extreme, many of them feel: Postponed Pushed aside Penalized. This group of teens believes part of the traditional American experience was lost
The Story of the Carrot, the Egg, and the Coffee Bean
By: Tim Elmore A young girl went to her grandmother and complained about how hard life had become for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed that, as one problem was solved, a new one arose. Her grandmother took her to the kitchen. She
“Phoneliness”: A New Term Defining Reality for Generation Z
By: Tim Elmore Jared and Tabitha dated for ten months. They met on an app, and the first four months of their relationship was limited to online interactions. When they chose to MIRL (Meet In Real Life), the encounter went well. At that point, they began to see each other face to face. In month ten, however, Jared decided to move on.
How Parents Must Correct Our Overcorrections
By: Tim Elmore A mother approached me recently after I spoke at a parents’ conference. She told me how much she cared for her 13-year-old son, yet many of his teachers referred to her, not as a “helicopter parent,” but as an “Apache Helicopter.” When she acknowledged how intrusive she was in her son’s life, I had to agree. She admitted to
Candles and Brush Fires
By: Tim Elmore I lived in southern California for many years. Every year, it seemed we heard about another fire that broke out. The dry, warm weather coupled with a careless mistake can be deadly. Wildfires have been rampant, destroying miles of property as they spread. During the summer and fall of 2018, California experienced the deadliest wildfire season in its history. A
Lessons in Grit from Ernest Shackleton’s Voyages
By: Tim Elmore An incredible discovery was just made beneath the ocean’s surface. Underwater drones were used to discover Ernest Shackleton’s famous ship, Endurance, the one that set out to reach the South Pole and establish a base on Antarctica’s Weddell Sea coast 100 years ago. Both the century-old voyage and the discovery are wonders of technology. Breaking Down the Story Most of us have
How to Help Students Fight a Victim Mentality
By: Tim Elmore I read two recent news stories that left me stunned. One young man from India chose to sue his parents for giving birth to him. He argued that he never asked to be born into this crazy world, and he wants some cash for having to endure it. I am not kidding. Another news story reported that a set of
What Do We Do When Kids Show More Courage than Police?
By: Tim Elmore Did you hear what just happened? Last week, Girl Scouts of the USA posthumously awarded ten-year-old Amerie Jo Garza of Uvalde, Texas, one of the highest honors bestowed in Girl Scouting: the “Bronze Cross.” Notice—the honor was given to Amerie Jo after she died. The Bronze Cross is awarded for saving or attempting to save a life at the risk
Five Ways the Pandemic Changed Team Members From Generation Z
By: Tim Elmore I distinctly remember interviewing for a full-time job with John C. Maxwell in 1982. John was not famous yet, except in certain circles, but he already displayed lots of agency. His personality filled the room. I was graduating college that year, and he expressed an interest in my skills. When I look back at that exchange, which later turned
How to Make the Most of Your Brain Based on Your Generation
By: Tim Elmore I just made a discovery. For the first time in my life, I realized I know people who are from seven sociological generations. My aunt and uncle are from the Senior generation (1902-1928). My mother and father-in-law are from the Builders generation (1929-1945). My wife and I are both from the baby boomer generation (1946-1964). My teammates Shawn and
The Connection Between Aspiration and Inspiration in Kids
By: Tim Elmore A boy named Norris began mowing lawns four years ago. I’m not talking about mowing his own lawn; he’d been doing that already. I mean he began mowing lawns for other people who needed it, starting with a disabled neighbor who lived nearby. He didn't make a big deal of it. He just marched over and mowed the lawn.
The Most Tangible Shift Generation Z Has Made from Millennials
By: Tim Elmore An NFL football coach recently told me of the tangible changes in professional athletes today compared to 25 years ago, when he first began coaching. He mentioned that players have a higher expectation of what they’ll receive as part of their compensation and feel entitled to having a voice in how the team is managed. These expectations are not
How to Lead a Kid Who’s an Underdog
By: Tim Elmore Even if you’re not a big Kentucky Derby fan, you’ve probably heard what just happened in the last race at Churchill Downs. To say the winner was a long shot is an understatement. A horse named Rich Strike won the derby, a race in which he did not even belong. It all took place on May 8th (less than
Do you speak Generation Z’s Language?
By: Tim Elmore It’s been over 50 years since the term generation gap was first coined by Life magazine editor John Poppy. During the 1960s, he noticed a gap between the young baby boomers and their parent’s generation, the Builders. Those boomers used new language the adults did not recognize. I am one of those baby boomers and, believe it or not,
Eleven Challenges All Young Employees Can Grow From
By: Tim Elmore As I spot “Help Wanted” signs on the windows of many establishments today, I often consider the qualities young job seekers should learn. Too often, young adults don’t take entry-level positions because they feel those jobs are beneath them. I recently reflected on the early experiences I had in my career that taught me lessons I may not have
One Social and Emotional Learning Step That Matures Students
By: Tim Elmore “My students enter the classroom as if they’re customers. They expect me to serve them curriculum, make it fun, and work hard to ensure they make good grades. It’s like they’re consumers,” bemoaned one teacher I met in Missouri. Then, she had an epiphany. “I guess they are consumers in one sense,” she concluded. “They digest a subject each day for
Compassion and Consequences: Can We Lead Students with Both?
By: Tim Elmore Last month, a Chicago Metra train conductor was robbed at gunpoint in broad daylight. Not long after, photos of the robbery suspect were released, and that’s when the armed thief was apprehended. Even though he was wearing a mask, it all happened so quickly. You’ll never guess how the thief was captured so fast. When the security camera’s photos were published,
How to Teach Social and Emotional Skills Without Being a Therapist
By: Tim Elmore Last month, I asked a group of educators a question, and the answer was revealing. A group of 21 teachers who use our Habitudes for Social and Emotional Learning all said they enjoyed the classroom conversation our images sparked but admitted: “Whenever I teach social and emotional skills, it inevitably brings up emotional issues like conflict resolution or anger management.
The Best Way to View the Pandemic, Two Years Into COVID-19
By: Tim Elmore The name COVID-19 is derived from three words. The first syllable, CO, is taken from corona. The second syllable, VI, is taken from virus. The D is for disease. And the number 19, reminds us that the virus began in 2019 when we first heard about missteps in a lab in China. The first infections took place among Chinese
Welcome to the Land of Tomorrow: Millennials vs. Generation Z at Work
By: Tim Elmore Last October, The New York Times ran an article called “The 37-Year-Olds Are Afraid of the 23-Year-Olds Who Work for Them.” It was about how entitled millennials are unable to manage their even more entitled Gen Z workers. The piece was interesting but needed explanation. The stories were anecdotal and didn’t completely line up with the data. It’s important we
Why I Remain Optimistic About Generation Z
By: Tim Elmore I just met a young woman on a podcast interview who helped me recapture my hope for the future. Her name is Shamma Al Mazrui, and she is from the United Arab Emirates. Shamma graduated from New York University, Abu Dhabi, as her nation’s first Rhodes Scholar. Shamma was then elected as the Minister of State for Youth in
The Drift We’ve Witnessed in Education
By: Tim Elmore When I spoke to Mr. Dunn, an English teacher of high school seniors, he told me he had one job: to teach language arts to teenagers. My first response was to agree. He had but one task each day, and he was doing a good job of it. When I reflected on the history of education in America, I recognized
How to Read a Book
By: Tim Elmore Almost everywhere we go, people ask the questions: How do you read so many books? Where do you find the time? Just how do you read a book? Do you read it from cover to cover? The fact is these questions stem from the belief that leaders are readers. By and large, if you plan to be a lasting
How Four Generations Differ in Their Approaches to Work
By: Tim Elmore In 2020, I heard a 19-year-old member of Generation Z use the word cheugy as he made fun of someone who was trying too hard to be hip and trendy. When I asked what older person he was poking fun at, he explained it was a 29-year-old Millennial. I laughed in disbelief. The generation gap surfaces so quickly. Too
One Secret Parents Can Use to Send the Best Versions of Their Kids to School
By: Tim Elmore I spoke to a clinical psychologist recently, after an arduous day with clients. Helen is a counselor who sees families for therapy every day. She revealed a tool to me that was so simple I asked her to repeat it. She called it a “secret” because so few parents know it or apply it—but it’s within the reach of
Seven Ideas to Overcoming the Cinderella Syndrome
By: Tim Elmore Seven Ideas to Overcoming the Cinderella Syndrome In 1989, I first heard the term Cinderella Syndrome. This complex refers to a psychological condition in which a woman fears true independence and secretly expects a “knight in shining armor” (or Prince Charming) to come along and take care of her. The term Cinderella complex was coined by Agatha Christie in a
Changing the Way We See Our Students
By: Tim Elmore Like so many other districts, the Northwest School District in Missouri faced a shortage of employees. It’s actually happening all over the country in almost every industry. “Help Wanted” signs go unanswered as fewer Americans want to take on lower-paying jobs in light of a pandemic. In the NW school district, custodial, food service, and before and after school
Striking a Balance Between Boundaries and Sacrifice
By: Tim Elmore I see a problem today more often than I’ve seen it in the past. It is a collision between mindsets, both of which are essential. They‘re illustrated in the following story. Several faculty and staff members were asked to participate in a special project at their school. They were to plan a celebration of the decrease in COVID-19 infections on
The Top Ten Leadership Movies of 2021
By: Tim Elmore In the past, I’ve posted blogs on great leadership movies and the conversations they can start with colleagues and students. Below, I offer you my list of the top leadership movies of 2021. This past year, the theme of leadership was subtle but definitely present. My son, Jonathan, is a movie buff, so together, he and I, offer this
Four Messages Your Freshmen Need To Hear This Year
By: Tim Elmore Brianna Rivera is an articulate high school student who wrapped her arms around a challenge that teens face today. Finding herself thrust back into society after quarantine, she said, “That’s a lot for me, after having been in isolation for 18 months. You want to get back into the swing of things, but there’s something kind of holding you