OK. I admit I have a warped sense of humor and every now and then, I decide to post a blog that has no value outside of a snicker or smile. This one is such a blog. Inspired by David Letterman, who for over 20 years has shared his “Top Ten Lists” on his Late Night show, I want to share a top ten list of my own. In this season of graduations, I thought you’d enjoy: “The Top Ten Signs You Won’t Graduate This Year.” I hope you smile…and that your students never experience any of these.
Top Ten Signs You Won’t Graduate This Year
1. Your fellow seniors tell you how much they’ll miss you at the graduation ceremony.
2. Your school administration reviews your grades and changes the school slogan to: “One Child Left Behind.”
3. Your history teacher begins telling you inspiring stories of people who made it big even though they never finished school.
4. You start convincing yourself how much you really like the cafeteria food.
5. The week of finals, your principal gets on the intercom and leads a moment of silent prayer for your self-esteem.
6. Your name is Todd, and the school marquee reads: Congratulations Seniors. Sorry Todd.
7. You favorite teacher tells you, “Diplomas are overrated.”
8. During graduation rehearsal, they send you out to the baseball field to pick four leaf clovers.
9. You begin putting permanent built-in cabinets in your dorm room and start pursuing relationships with the freshman class.
10. As the other seniors walk across the stage and receive their diploma, you are handed a copy of John Maxwell’s book, Failing Forward.